But Time Takes Time, You Know [Musebox]

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

It's hard to research things that haven't happened yet, Howard discovers. Rather than hitting the library, like he would have on Stacy, he has to spend a lot of time thinking, sitting around talking to Barbara about every detail he remembers of his family history. Every year that passes by, the memories get a little more obscure, a little less refined, and he starts to panic, thinking that he won't have enough information to track down his family at all soon.

Over endless cups of tea, Barbara asks questions ("do you remember your mother's maiden name? do you know where your father's parents were from before they came to California? do you remember what their professions were?") to try and drag out the useful information, but it ends up being a stray memory of a Christmas dinner that puts the pieces in place.

"My grandma has to be in San Francisco. They had a one year wedding anniversary ornament on the Christmas tree of the Golden Gate Bridge, and I'm pretty sure they got married in 1969."

What they were doing in San Francisco is beyond his knowledge, but it's the closest they have to a shot. He doesn't know what hospitals his parents were born in, or where his paternal grandparents might be now, or even what year his parents are going to meet. It takes a lot of agonizing before he decides to spend all that money he's been saving in a can under the sink on plane tickets for him and Barbara to go there, but when he invites her she agrees that it's important to him, and besides, how often does one get to vacation in America?

So they both have suitcases packed and a promise to be back in ten days, waiting for Ian in the kitchen to come drive them to the airport. Howard's nervous, naturally, because he's not sure how he'll introduce himself to total strangers as their grandkid from the future. But he's come to relax a bit - a bit - over the last few years, and as such he just chews his lip and bounces his leg a bit rather than panics. He even got six hours of sleep last night. It's truly a miracle.

Comments

[first_in_time]

"Exactly what I was thinking...but what do you mean 'sciency'? It's just a bridge." And that was how all bridges were in her mind. Despite knowing the history behind a few of them, they were just constructions to help man get from one side of the river to the other. Nothing more.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"It's all math and physics and chemistry and architecture. Building them, I mean. Don't you think it's kind of cool to think about how they build the pillars and stuff that goes way under the water, deeper than you can dive?"

It's really a shame he never got along with the traditional school environment; he really isn't averse to learning.

[first_in_time]

"I haven't really thought about it before, but I suppose that it is. Is it something you've studied?" she asked, forgetting for a moment that Howard wasn't much of a student.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"No, not really. But I draw a lot of pictures of buildings, so." He shrugs. He pays attention to architecture because he likes to think of how things are built, how they're dismantled, all the pieces going together. It matches his hobbies. "Anyway, what else would we get him? If we get him a shirt or something John'll probably get snot or something on it."

Kids are awful and messy and sticky and why do you have one, Barbara.

"There's coffee here. Let's grab some and keep walking." Possibly this is all part of Howard's nefarious plot to get Barbara as hooked on coffee as he is.

[first_in_time]

Because he is adorbz, Howard

"I like that idea." Since Ian had started to drink coffee every morning, and Howard enjoyed his coffee more than most things in life, Barbara was slowly growing more accustomed to the idea of it.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard goes to the coffee shop and gets a pound for Ian and fresh cups of dark coffee for himself and Barbara. He checks his wallet - he thinks he has enough money to last him through the trip, but it'll be tight. He'd rather steal than make Barbara cover his food costs for the next ten days, though.

"Here you go." He brings her her cup with Ian's bag of coffee under his arm. "We have twenty minutes to get across to the next terminal, so we should be fine."

[first_in_time]

Barbara thanked him and set off at a lazy stroll in the direction they had to go, sipping from the takeaway cup.

"So it's another 9 hour flight?"

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Yep. Having fun yet?" He cracks his neck. "I figure we'll spend the first day there sleeping ourselves silly."

[first_in_time]

"Oh, I always have fun with you," she smiled. "Ian told me that the first day in another timezone throws you entirely, and all you can do is sleep."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"I know, I'm just a barrel of laughs." He glances down and smiles, though. He doesn't know if she just feels obligated to say it because she's adopted family, but he wants to hang on to the idea that he brings some positivity into her life. The compliment, no matter how deep it was meant, hangs warm and beloved in his chest.

"Maybe we'll be so thrown we can watch a sunrise together. Over the bridge. That'd be cool, right?"

[first_in_time]

"Sounds very romantic," she told him with a smile, "you'd best be careful with that sort of talk or else Ian might think he has some competition." The grin Barbara wore quite clearly stated that she didn't think that for a moment, but sometimes it was fun to tease.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

Howard flushes an even darker red. "Sorry, but..." He fakes a shudder.

"I tried dating someone, though. It didn't go so hot." The terminal calls for boarding and they head in that direction.

[first_in_time]

Barbara giggled at him, and looped an arm around his shoulders to squeeze him briefly.

"I understand, but you didn't tell me about dating anyone! Who was she?"

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"That's because it only lasted like, three dates. Didn't seem worth it to mention. It was just some girl I met through work, we went to a few movies and it didn't really click." Mostly because he realized that playing straight was way harder in a relationship. "I'm still not sure I get this whole romance thing."

[first_in_time]

"I'm sorry to hear that," she said as they joined the line. "Maybe one day everything will fall into place around you, and you'll love someone very special who'll help you understand, or discover the ideas of romance."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Maybe." Howard always gets a little nervous getting his ticket and passport checked - he spent a lot of money for a fake passport, but he's never quite sure if his will pass muster. "Or maybe I'll start going to singles nights or something. Convince Ian once and for all that I'm not scared of girls."

No, he's never going to get over that.

[first_in_time]

"Ian doesn't think you're scared of girls..." well, he did. But wasn't it better to make Howard think something different? "Whatever you decide to do, you've got our full support. You know that."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Yeah, and someday I'll even deserve that support." They find seats on the plane - Howard lets Barbara have the window seat again. "I'm going to try and nap again, if you don't mind."

[first_in_time]

She didn't like how he replied to that but said nothing of it. Howard's self esteem wasn't great at the best of times. It wasn't always worth arguing.

"Of course I don't mind," she replied, "nap all you like."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

It'll probably take another decade before he's well and over feeling like he wasn't worth his parents sticking around for.

He doesn't wait for the announcements, just finds a comfortable spot on the chair and tries to use his sleep debt to battle back the caffeine he just drank. After a little bit, it works, and he sleeps until they're somewhere over the Midwest. Something in his sleep bothers him, drawing tense lines into his face, but he doesn't stir. When he wakes up he blinks and rubs his face, entirely disoriented.

[first_in_time]

Barbara was having a quiet conversation with a friendly stewardess, but upon Howard's waking, she left.

"How are you feeling?" Barbara asked him softly, for most of the cabin were still asleep.

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

"Nervous," he says quietly. "Like maybe this is going to be a disaster."

He glances over to the stewardess, now taking someone else's order. "Making friends?"

[first_in_time]

Barbara patted his knee. Maybe it would be a disaster, but maybe it wouldn't be. She still wasn't sure how Howard was going to attack the idea of being from the future...he would handle it well, however. Of that she was certain.

"Seems that way," she replied. "I think she was a little bored, being the only one awake. The others are all catch up on their sleep."

[iselldrugstothecommunity]

He breathes deep through his nose. Whatever happens, he's just going to have to push through it. It's strange, though - he can envision some idea of what it's going to be like leading up to the meeting, but trying to plan out what he'll say is like trying to peer through fog. It's all a blank. And he's scared - his knee is shaking a bit under Barbara's hand.

He looks around at the sleeping passengers. "Sorry I'm making you travel so far. I'm buying you clam chowder when we get to San Fran."

[first_in_time]

"What's clam chowder?"

By the time the duo made it to California, Barbara was exhausted. They waited for their luggage by the carousel, where they had to fight, elbows bared, with the other passengers for a chance to spot their luggage.

Despite finally having their suitcases in hand, they had not yet won the war. Still, they had to catch a taxi (or 'cab' as Barbara was told to refer to them by), to their hotel and check in. The 'cab' was nothing like a taxi, in Barbara's opinion.

And while Barbara wasn't often the one to call anyone incompetent, the hotel had indeed come close to being listed under that adjective in Barbara's mind. Until they were upgraded due to a stuff up by someone, and their rooms being cancelled on them, then rebooked and moved over to some place else.

Eventually, she was able to collapse onto one of the beds. "I'm not getting up for several hours," she told Howard, muffled somewhat by the pillow she had landed face-first in.